Philip Holland
Civil Celebrant. 📍NSW
As I felt the last lock click to open, I stumbled into my house as I was cursing out public transport for being so unreliable. I slid my shoes off and rushed over to my dining room table (where all my editing work goes down) and opened up my laptop searching for the Zoom app. It took me a few minutes to figure out how to send the Zoom link (I always forget how to send a Zoom link properly) and once I heard the ding of an incoming email, I had a feeling it would say that my next interview subject was already online, waiting for me in the Zoom chat.
Racing over to the sink to fill up my cup of water, I thought about what type of personality I would encounter when interviewing Philip Holland. I’ve learnt quickly that you can never assume what someone is going to be like when you interview them about their job. But I did make up one assumption in my head earlier after reading Philip Holland’s website biography. That assumption was that he was going to be a gentle soul….. and I learned that my assumption was bang on the money.
Talking to Philip felt like having a catch-up with a friend you haven’t seen in a while. I immediately felt a feeling of comfort and ease when I explained to him what my blog was about. He was kind, inquisitive and showed humour when the time called for it.
I found his wealth of knowledge to be detailed and his personality to be compassionate and honest.
Even though our interview was over Zoom, he filled the space of my empty dining room.
For that 30 minutes, it was filled with wonderful stories from a great man.
A true master of adding special touches to a ceremony.
The Interview
When was the first wedding you officiated?
‘2005 was my first wedding and yes, that was about 970 weddings ago. Not that I’m counting.’ Laughs
What sets apart an average celebrant from a great celebrant?
‘I think somebody who understands what the couples want and surprises them and over-delivers basically with what they normally expect out of marriage celebrant. Also, being flexible, adaptable. I’ve done so many weddings for couples where we’ve kept in touch ever since. I like to send out “Happy Anniversary” messages for their 1st, 5th, 10th, 15th wedding anniversaries. I generally send the messages out the day before the anniversary and I send it to the husband and I think that if he’s forgotten the anniversary, he is going to be very grateful for this message.’
What is one of the most incredible venues you have officiated a wedding?
‘Well, there was one on Cockatoo Island that was pretty amazing. It was up in these old remains of a convict, stone building on the island there. So that was pretty special. I did one on the roof of the Crown Tower. I’ve done them on farms. I’ve done them on beaches. I’ve done them in backyards. I’ve done so many around the harbour. That’s always spectacular.’
How do you go about approaching a personalised ceremony for each couple?
‘Well, I do two things. One, I give them my wedding manual that is full of suggestions for the vows, the readings and so on and a little planning form that shows the structure of the service. I also stress to them there is a couple of elements in there that are marked in red. They are legal elements which they can’t avoid like that I have to introduce myself and tell people that I’m authorised to perform weddings. I have to read the Monitum, which is the legal definition of marriage in Australia. In the vows, they have to say one particular sentence, plus anything else they would like to say. Then, I have to declare them “married” and witness the signatures along with two other witnesses.
The second thing I do to really personalise it, I offer to write a little story about them. It’s always quite a light-hearted story. I send them a questionnaire with questions like
-How did you meet?
-What was your first date like?
-What did you think of your partner when you first met? What have you done together since being a couple?
-What are the things you like and what are the things that irritate you about the other?
And I always suggest that they print off two copies and answer them separately because quite often, the answers aren’t the same and that can be hilarious on the day. So I then read them out on the day and it’s always a lovely way to start a ceremony. There’s generally a few laughs in there. There’s all sorts of little elements you can include in the ceremony. Sometimes I do, when the parents of the couple are not English speakers, I always offer to do a welcome and a giving away in the parent’s language. I just get them to write out a couple of sentences phonetically and I get a round of applause, you know. It always just goes down so well and makes the day even more memorable and the parents feel like they have been included in the ceremony.’
What reminds you of why you love to do this?
‘Always, how grateful the couples are.
Like, how many jobs are there where you can receive that sort of feedback? Always makes it all worth it.’
You can contact Philip via